One of the biggest parts of our identity is our sexuality. Who we are attracted to plays a very big part in how we perceive life and its experiences. Therefore, it is essential that we understand not only what our own sexuality is, but also how people around us identify.
The fact that sexuality is a spectrum is not a new concept. It was initially introduced by Alfred Kinsey, Wardell Pomeroy, and others in Sexual Behaviour in the Human Male (1948) and was known as the Kinsey Scale. It ranged from 0 to 6 with “0” meaning completely heterosexual and “6” meaning completely homosexual. Those who were categorized as “3” on the scale were completely bisexual and experienced regular attraction towards both genders. While our understanding of gender identities and sexuality has evolved a lot more since then, it is necessary to understand the history of the concept.
Bisexuality, traditionally, was defined as equal attraction to both men and women, it is not the case today. Bisexuality in itself comprises of all the people who are attracted to people of two or more (but not all) gender identities and not necessarily in equal measure i.e. they can have a preference and that won’t mean they are any less bisexual.
Another sexuality that is often considered the same as bisexuality, is pansexuality. Pansexual individuals are the ones who are attracted to all gender identities. While it is very similar to bisexuality, it is important that we educate ourselves about the difference. Understanding your sexuality can be a very difficult task, and many individuals, especially those who come under the bisexuality and pansexuality umbrella, often change what they identify as. Therefore, it is important that whether you are a member of the community or an ally, you know the difference between the various identities and not make someone feel as if their experiences or identity is being erased.
Asexuality was another identity that was part of the Kinsey Scale. It was denoted as “X”. Asexual individuals are those who feel no sexual attraction to any one gender identity. This term is often used interchangeably with aromantic, which is wrong. While asexuals are not sexually attracted, they are still capable of feeling romantic attractions or feelings towards others. On the other hand, aromantics are not romantically attracted to or attached to anyone but are still capable of sexual attraction. Aromantics can be homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, pansexual or even asexual.
Many individuals are incapable of having a sexual attraction to someone they don’t already have a strong bond with. These individuals identify as “Demisexual”. These bonds are not necessarily romantic but can also be platonic bonds with friends. This is contrary to those who voluntarily choose not to engage in sexual activities in the absence of shared feelings.
The sexuality spectrum consists of many other sexualities and many more are yet to be identified. While many people may identify as a particular sexual orientation, each individual’s sexuality is unique. It is a deeply personal and integral part of their self-identity and it is impossible for us to understand it all. So it is important to be sensitive towards everyone’s identity and experiences, because they may not be the same as yours.
Best way to sensitize yourself is by educating yourself about the issues and the hurdles faced by others. It is also important that you learn to be a good ally if you are not part of the community yourself. Read books, articles and watch videos on the topic. Do not depend on your friends who are part of the community to teach you about this. It is not their responsibility to be your guide. If you have not made an effort to do so already, it is high time you started.
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